Lately, I have been rather down with J's behavior. Despite telling him umpteen times that he should be polite, greet people, say thank you, look into the eyes of the person, he just doesn't do it willingly. He still doesn't take initiative to wash his dishes. He can be rather sloppy washing his hands... etc etc. I felt like I am at my wit's end, struggling and swinging between giving in (unwittingly exhibiting permissive parenting style) and insisting with all my might (unwittingly exhibiting autocratic parenting style), creating a conflict zone at home. It is so hard. I kept making mistakes. I need wisdom (my birthday wish is to create an encouraging atmosphere at home).
I knelt before God, prayed and cried my heart out...
How amazing and timely then it is when God directed me to this post from Love Our Children Now:
"If he had forgotten for the 5th time what I just taught him yesterday…. I must teach it again. If he has shouted at me, openly defied me and lied to me, for the zillionth time…. I must forgive him, (even if he has not apologised). If I have been training him to do something for the past one year and he was doing it successfully for a month but drops the habit in the 2nd month… I must start the training all over again."
"...let me humbly learn to do what I can humanly do... for the rest, they either do not matter, or God will handle."
You can read the whole post below:
http://www.loveourchildrennow.sg/2016/04/28/one-day-they-will-because-i-did-not-give-up/
God also sent a dear friend, L, who has raised her children up, and whose words below uplifted me:
"Do not worry, E, and what's been talked in the home will stay with the child, love them lots and God will do the rest, keep trusting and keep attending church as often as you possibly can manage."
I will remember to:
1. Love my children lots - meaning in the area of character training and academic training to repeat and repeat teaching with love, forgive, forgive, forgive, do not give up, accept them just as they are.
This verse came to mind. God is training me to love through our children:
"It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails" - 1 Corinthians 13:7-8
2. Do what I can humanly do... and allow God's grace to cover all my mistakes.
3. Let God handle the rest.
God also sent some respite and rest, by giving me baby C who is already sleeping through the night.
Oh how blessed it is to have God by our side, that I do not have to struggle through life's challenges alone.
Bless this mother who shared her parenting journey and please continue to help her too.
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