Friday 1 July 2011


J Summary (2Y3M26D) - Who is the Child?

What an Angel is... Sometimes

I haven't been to my favourite stores - Tiger and Søstrene Grene for a long time. So after picking up J from daycare today, I went to the stores. I was holding up different toys, and got tempted to buy them. Each time, J (2Y3M26D) said to me in Mandarin, "Mommy, no need to buy, we have them at home already". Oh what a sweet angelic child, helping mommy to save money. And what did mommy do? She went ahead to buy the toys anyway. Hmmm.... who's the child? J or Mommy.

Because I have been out shopping, I have not been able to make dinner this evening, oops. Well, some days are like that - does not work like clockwork.

Language Development

J could count very well in Mandarin Chinese from 1 to 10, however, he would miss out the number 4. Might as well, as the number 4 is considered to be "unlucky" in Chinese, although I have never told him that.

J is progressing very well in his Mandarin Chinese, at least seen in the eyes of my friends. Every turn I make, all the mommies of mixed-Danish Chinese children around me are confiding in me on how their children are speaking only Danish and refusing to speak Mandarin Chinese, from those who are younger than J to those who are older.

J at the moment is doing the reverse, speaking Mandarin to me and even Daddy. Daddy is congratulating me for my big success and he is very optimistic that I will continue to succeed. But deep down, I am actually feeling very insecure, but I can't tell all my friends that, as since in their eyes, I am already in a much better position than they are. They would be feeling that I am not being thankful. But seeing all their children going down the road of only speaking Danish makes me realize just how vulnerable a position we are in, in this trilingualism pursuit. It is a matter of time that he would be like one of those children. I need to pray for strength and determination to go on.

I started to also pay more attention to speaking English to J. At first, he did not say a word. He would only repeat after me, if I speak in Mandarin. But lately a few days ago, he started repeating the English words I said, although it was clearly mispronounced compared to his fluent pronounciation of Mandarin. But there is some slow, but steady progress in English, that is, if I continue to perservere on... Some days, I feel like having split personality - trying my very best to switch between English and Mandarin. What I do right now, if I feel up to form, is to speak one day in Mandarin and the following day in English.

Speaking English to my colleagues come naturally, but somehow, it just doesn't come naturally with J. I guess, the first language you use to speak with the person always stay. I speak Mandarin to J from day 1 and the very first hour of his birth, thus I still find it very difficult to switch over to English.

And Danish? When J is not around, I will take the chance to speak Danish with Daddy, but it happens rather sporadic. I have not been so determined to do so as trying to switch switching between Mandarin, English and Danish makes me feel like I am having triple split personalities.

It is a very taxing to my brain cells, and at times very tiring and trying. But by hook or by crook, I will go on... with all my insecurities in my heart, that sometimes, even Daddy does not understand. He is the optimist, and I am the pessimist. It is good to be married to Daddy, as he always lifts me up. I can only see all the things I have not done, and get depressed. He could see all the things I have done.

Saying "yes mommy"

J helped me with cleaning up after dinner yesterday and today almost perfectly. As he moves towards 3 years old, I could really see that the terrible two is soon behind us (hopefully).

My best friend Jannie reminded me that children wants you to decide, and are happier, when you are firm and decide, and love you even more. How right she is. Her daughter loves her dad a lot, because he is more firm.

I am the lenient one at home. However, recently, I have become more resolved. I give J instructions, and expect him to say "yes, mommy" (in mandarin). Thank God, J has been willing to say, "yes mommy" without going to war. I have noticed that when he said "yes mommy", he would be more willing to obey my instructions. I have also asked him to look into my eyes when saying "yes, mommy", but I have not been very successful yet. He would always avoid eye contact.

Yesterday, J succeeded in getting out of the crib on his own. It would be a short-lived period of using it as a time out site soon...

Loves to Sing

J loves to sing now. I am trying to follow him and incorporate more singing into our activities.

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