Sunday, 16 February 2014

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Encouragements to Press On with Weekly Family Meeting Night (WFMN)

     
    Weekly Family Meeting Night as we all know, don't always go as planned or go as well. But don't give up. Press on. Here are some encouragements from Stephen R. Covey: 
     
  • Don’t Give Up (You’re Going to Be “Off Track” 90% of the Time. So What?)

  • Be patient. Go slowly. Respect the level of understanding of each person. Don’t bulldoze through the material. Keep in mind that when you’re working with your family, “slow” is “fast” and “fast” is “slow.”

  • When people go through this book together – when they read it together, discuss it together, talk back and forth and get the new insights and learnings and understandings together – it starts a bonding process that becomes truly exciting. The spirit is one of being equally yoked together: “I’m not perfect. You’re not perfect. We’re learning and growing together.”

  • When you share in humility what you are learning, with no intent to “shape up” someone else, it unfreezes the labels or judgments others have of you and makes it “safe”, permissible and legitimate for you to continue to grow and change.

  • Do not get discouraged if your initial efforts meet with resistance. Keep in mind that any time you try something new, you’re going to get some flack. Just smile and keep moving forward. I promise you: It will be worth the effort!

  • In everything you do in your family, you keep in mind the miracle of the Chinese bamboo tree. After the seed for this amazing tree is planted, you see nothing, absolutely nothing, for 4 years except for a tiny shoot coming out of a bulb. During those 4 years, all the growth is underground in a massive, fibrous root structure that spreads deep and wide in the earth. But then in the fifth year, the Chinese bamboo tree grows up to 80 feet! Many things in family life are like the Chinese bamboo tree. You work and invest your time and effort, and you do everything you can possibly do to nurture growth, and sometimes you don’t see anything for weeks, months, or even years. But if you’re patient and keep working and nurturing, that “fifth year” will come, and you will be astonished at the growth and change you see taking place.

  • Patience is faith in action. Patience is emotional diligence. It’s the willingness to suffer inside so that others can grow. It reveals love. It gives birth to understanding. Even as we become aware of our suffering in love, we learn about ourselves and our own weaknesses and motives. We must “never, never, NEVER give up!”

  • No matter how far away a son or daughter seems to be, hang in there. Never give up. Eventually, like the Prodigal son, they will return. You will reclaim them.

  • Even if nothing else happens during family time, just the joy of being together and doing things together will have tremendous positive effect on the Emotional Bank Accounts in the family.

  • When you are attempting to make a change, you need to make the resolve deep and allow no exceptions.

  • The most important thing is to make the commitment to do it once a week no matter what.

  • And no matter what happens in your family night meeting, don’t get discouraged.

  • We have even had meetings where people were being so noisy, so disrespectful that we have said, “Ok, we have had it! You come and get us when you are ready to meet!” and walked out. When we leave, we always came back later and apologized.

  • We have had meetings where the children were sprawled out on the couch asleep.

  • We have had meetings that basically started out a big fight and ended up in prayer.

  • We have had meetings where the children were being difficult and uncooperative.

  • It is not always easy, but it is worth it.

  • Sometimes you even wonder if your children are getting anything out of it.

  • In fact, you may not be able to see the real results for years.

  • Foundations are being laid that will make a huge difference down the road.

  • Just the fact that we are doing it, that we are trying, is tremendously important.

  • But even a tiny change in your direction today will make a significant difference hundreds of miles down the road.

  • Remember the Apollo example – where do you think the most power and energy was expended on that heavenly journey? More energy was spent in the first few minutes of liftoff from earth than was used in half a million miles for several days. But once they did break out, it took almost no power to do all those other things.

  • Be patient with yourself. Even be patient with your own impatience.

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