Friday 3 December 2010

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Let you be the one to bring in the romance


Two days ago, a friend told me that her marriage is getting mundane. Her husband is no longer as romantic as before. I did not know how to advise her.

I recalled back in the past when I encountered this problem. How did I deal with it? I remembered I complained to God in my quiet time with Him.

So what did God say to me when I complained to Him?

He said, "My dear E, look at yourself, how romantic are you?"

I said, "Mmmm... well... but God, it is the man's role to be romantic! I am a woman!!!"

God said, "My dear E, then imagine yourself as a man... and put yourself in my Significant Other's shoes, and let say, you need to do something to be romantic... how well do you think you will fair?"

"Perhaps you are putting too much pressure on my Significant Other. If you want to up the romantic factor, then work on it together, starting with yourself."

Ouch! Ok God... you are dealing with me again. If I am unhappy with the romance factor in our marriage, then let me be the one to learn to be romantic.

But how do I know how to be romantic? I must say, I am not a very romantic person, and I have no clue how to make it better.

Then God led me to do research on how to be romantic :-) and I found this book in a Christian bookshop in Singapore. Although I am not a romantic person, research and shopping are definitely skills I am good at :-)

Here are two of the suggestions from this book, one to the man, another to the woman:

"The home is an extension of most wives' hearts. Ask your wife to give you a "honey-do" list. If there's any way you can perform the chores, do them for her whether you hate them or not".

"Create an inexpensive adventure date. Go to the train station or bus station and catch the first ride to wherever it's going. Explore the area together and learn esomething new. No matter where it is, you'll be seeing it together. You'll find something there for just the two of you, and it will make the journey special."

Maybe I should lend my friend this book, and to suggest to her to let the romance begins with her.

God's Word says in Matthew 7:3:

" Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?" - Matthew 7:3

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